I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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