1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Randomize