just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
