have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Randomize
