It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize