quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
