The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Randomize
