talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
