Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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