and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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