I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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