would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Randomize
