Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
This house was built for laser tag.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
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