yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
