my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
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he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
We talked him into tasing himself.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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