..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
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