She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So many bounce houses so little time
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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