drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
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