Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Randomize
