Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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