Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
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