i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize