She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
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Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
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They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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