she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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