I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
