Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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