I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Rumble strips road head = magical
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
