I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
