Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry DustinMcPotHead hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(858): View more from California

I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest

Fav 4 1923 652
share tweet
(207): View more from Maine

If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.

Fav 14 3065 841
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(408): View more from California

So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.

Fav 13 894 6070
share tweet
(617): View more from Massachusetts

May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape

Fav 12 4839 1824
share tweet
(202): View more from Washington, DC

Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!

Fav 30 5166 1000
share tweet
(703): View more from Virginia

I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?

Fav 72 21717 4260
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(206): View more from Washington

I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.

Fav 11 1241 2980
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(615): View more from Tennessee

Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?

Fav 2 184 124
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(206): View more from Washington

So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.

Fav 0 92 13
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT