dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
After last night, I could never be a politician.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Randomize
