The maid of honor just puked.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
