You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
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Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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