He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
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