you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
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It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
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