yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I have feelings that need drinking.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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