I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Randomize
