all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
PANTIES FOUND
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
