Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Randomize
