When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Randomize
