we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Randomize