Three words: puerto rican gang bang
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
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