I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
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