Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Randomize
