I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
