We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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