I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
