I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
