he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize