We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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