dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
it hurts more in the daytime
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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