Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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