their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Randomize
